We had a date party one night and I was taking a hot piece of ass–like 50k followers on IG and shit–and I am pregaming before we head to the venue. The old boys were hazing and shit so I of course have to chug a fifth which gets me shitty as fuck for all the fucking pictures we were taking and eventually we head to the party.
I get to the venue with airplane bottles waistbanded and all up in my dates tits and we get in through security–and i start to feel world war three going down in my stomach.
I make it in the bathroom in time to puke my guts out in the shitter and rally enough for a second wind out on the dance floor. I head back out and we are getting down to this music and I’m grinding with my hand up in the air and the whole two yards.
While she is getting down low turns out those fucking pants couldn’t hold all that ass and them bitches bust right open. So she is getting pissed her pants ripped and worried about her pants being half off and I convince her that I can see them back up in my room.
We head back to my abode and I am getting shit to try and fix these pants or some shit and she is just getting all over me so we get down.
Turns out puke and rally = new hottest girl.